House guests and Star Wars

P had looked forward to the block party for a year. So when he asked, Friday, if we could sleep through Saturday(block party day) to skip to Sunday faster, I knew he was super excited to see Ella and Reed (our dear friends from Kansas). All day Sunday he asked when we could go to Grand Central. Even as he laid suspiciously still on the couch. Even as he covered his eyes with his flax seed pillow. Even as he eschewed food for the cool floor.

Fortunately, his fever was short lived and we were able to adventure with our friends the following morning. Our typical tourist trappings weren't at the top of the kids' lists, so we mapped the Empire State Building, Dylan's Candy Bar, Central Park, it's Zoo and FAO Schwartz in an attempt to minimize walking for short, midwestern legs.

While the kids were a bit underwhelmed by the mighty matron of the city, the candy shop didn't disappoint :) P handles the sweet shop with aplomb, and I'm always surprised ;) Two floors of brightly colored sugars, all of which he is allergic to, shine beneath bright lights and booming music. A childhood candy aficionado myself, P's allergies to fake foods have put an extra emphasis on my adult whole foods preferences, and my feelings about candy shops were summed up in this one shot: (The treat's name said it all :)

                                  P and Ella, wowed by the wonders of a candy filled floor:

Its not just my kid that likes to climb rocks in Central Park. After a couple of subway rides, our guest were giddy running into the rock strewn green for a snack.

                             Public art, en route to the zoo (cuz climbing rocks doesn't always do):

After climbing, we headed to the zoo. I had waxed poetic about seeing a polar bear in real life and hoped he wouldn't be holed up in the heat. But no disappointments there, we were all thrilled to see him bobbing in the water, watching us watching him. Mammals in captivity break my heart, especially when they make eye contact ;) P seems to have the same reaction, because after seeing the snow leopard glide past the glass, he demanded to know why the regal feline wasn't in his natural habitat.... Nevertheless, the zoo was a success, all three kids seemed pleased as pie with the lovely animals and the giant spiderweb.

At FAO, P very carefully picked his prize - a special occasion since friends were here. Yup, I said "special occasion." After years of constant toy purchases, we agreed to take a break. We're fully stocked, overflowing our space, in fact, due to toys (seriously, we own almost nothing other than toys, toy containers and the food making basics). And the child.... he doesn't play that much with them these days! He typically turns towards his rocks and sticks, a cardboard box, BB or a hammer and a board. And, of course, us. His favorite toys, the live robots that play endlessly, he can spend an hour on the floor with either of us and nothing else but sheer joy. He's finally starting to realize this and has decided to wait a while for new additions, (thank the holy freakin stars.) But there is a difference between taking a break from toy stores and actually leaving a live toy store empty handed :)

So, despite his total ignorance on all things Star Wars, the Little Man chose light sabers. His best buddy is all about Star Wars and has been talking up his lighted swords for a while now. Additionally, the older boy downstairs has spoken of Star Wars in hushed, reverential tones. This has made an impact. Nevertheless, P agrees he's nowhere near ready to watch the flick. But swords with lights, well, that sounded kinda cool :)

And honestly, they are. Our previous swords have been a tad short (read: hand injuries) for me to enjoy swordplay with P. And its a pursuit he loves. Now we can jab and dive together, in the dark, bouncing on the bed, illuminated by our sabers. Its ridiculously fun.

But there's one problem. P got a red one and a blue one. Then Reed told him the red one was the bad guy's. Well, P doesn't really want me to be the bad guy and he doesn't really like the idea of the bad guy going after me either - so after a few rounds, he was stuck. I let him sit with it and then suggested the colors were ours to interpret. No go. Damn defined toys. Sticks pose no such problem ;) Hmmm, I said, maybe I could be a good guy that had grabbed a bad guy's saber? (Don't even get me started on the good guy/bad guy delineation!) He liked this solution and we swung and bounced merrily, for a moment. Then he stopped. "But wait. If we're both good guys..... why are we fighting?" OMG. I love this child.

Day two had big plans for two museums and plenty of park play... and we just barely made it through the American Museum of Natural History. After our afternoon indoors with bunches of bones, we headed to Belvedere Castle before getting dinner. Travel with kids is an amazingly different beast that beats to its very own drum :)

                                                         The pic P took at he the AMNH:

P was sad to see his friends (and their mum!) leave the next morning. He, in all seriousness, invited them to be our flat-mates :) Unfortunately, I'd guess that a few more days of P inspired late nights and Reed inspired early mornings and the situation would have been less "Three's Company" and more "Star Wars," for real :)

AMNH: Back in time, buts and budgeting...

Ok, speaking of jonesing for dolphin skulls (just what I longed for at four ;), I still haven't posted pics from before we went to Kansas! (Remember this poem:)

So, skipping back over a month ago, we went to the American Museum of Natural History (again:). It was a fun day with P's little unschooler friend, Logan, and his mum. Its Fabulous hanging out with other unschoolers (especially these two!). Really. The level of respect is relaxing. The small people receive just as much respect as the big people (they're not less of a person just because they have less mass, right?) so there's no feeling of "come'on! Get your kid to go with the flow, I'm tired of waiting," foot tap, finger roll, small sigh. Each bathroom break, snack grab, shoe tie, water break, attention break, angry shriek, happy shriek, bathroom break, well, you get the idea, is as honored as breathing and its all chill and happy. Ahhhhh :)



I've posted about the AMNH a million times, so I'll spare the gory details, excepting the gift shop gab. Thorn in my side, bane of my expedition existence, these pop up on every freakin' floor. We saw a new installation (absolutely Fabulous, by the way) called Extreme Mammals (featuring P's new fave, the platypus and that infamous dolphin skull) that dumped us right into another gift shop. Oy.

Which inevitably brings back up the budget issue. Living in Nyc ain't cheap. And, supposedly requires savings. Which requires not buying every saber tooth tiger skull that we see. But. But :) But....

I think this is one of the most challenging areas for me, philosophically, as a parent. P is just as much a part of this family as E or I, and is thusly budgeted. But, here's the first big, hairy "but", E and I are old enough to actually, patiently, understand a budget :) The little man, not so much... He's progressing on that path though. As we discussed a particular "want" in Kansas, and how we'd make it happen ("now" always being his preferred timeline, of course!) I gently reminded him that we were saving so that Papa could quit his job or we could move someday, something, anything, that would make for more family time - and that I'd like to factor that into our planning. He nodded solemnly (being totally on the bandwagon for that plan himself) and patted my hand. "Mama, you know the money I'm saving that I find on the ground? You can have all of it to help Papa quit his job." Awwww. So, slowly but surely, that particular "but" is stepping aside, leaving room for the other "buts" banging around my brain...

While we do have a tight budget, we aren't crazy strapped, so P could get junk semi-regularly. But :), he doesn't want to buy junk, having absorbed environmental thoughts (I swear we aren't mind-messing here, merely modeling!) from both his parents and the lovely Dr. Suess (ahhh, the Lorax, so sad, so fab, so inpirational) and the fairly scary Wall-E movie. . Junky toys break and can't be reused by the next generation. P doesn't like this. He tries to reclaim anything he finds left over after stoop sales in order to save it from the dump :) So this dumps the idea of buying junk to fit into the budget...

Thus, back to the buts. We could buy decent (non-junk) toys semi-regularly, "but".... we're running out of room. Nyc living is also compact living. Three of us sleep in what most midwesterners would consider a walk in closet. We love it, no complaining here, and we've found lots of ways to add toy storage to our space, but there are only so many walls for shelves. I love, love, loved in Sex and the City when the main character mentions lipstick purchases as a serious commitment to a New Yorker, since we have to seriously consider where each little addition will dwell in our tiny domains.

Fortunately for P, I love to reorganize space, and figuring new toy storage is like a Tetris-addict's high for me, so that particular "but" only holds for the biggest of budget benders (the almost life sized stuffed baby elephant at the Central Park Zoo gift shop pops to mind here...) And I've already done away with the "but won't we spoil him" "but" long ago (he's not an egg!!!), but the anti-consumerist "but" is probably the hairiest but for this particular tree-hugger. My shield against this fun deflating arrow of angst has thus far been attempting to remember that these are my issues, not my child's. But, if everyone keeps consuming at the contemporary rate, over-consumption of the world's resources will snowball into my child's issue. And probably in my lifetime, so I'll have the added bonus of watching my child wade through a world of with-outs. I have yet to shake this "but."

Then, the last "but" butts its way in. But, we've got so many toys already!!! I know, deep down, this is a silly "but", as silly as the phrase "too many black shoes" is laughable. But, its not black shoes I'm asked to buy daily. Don't get me wrong, I love toys, truly. "But", as I'm the one picking up the countless toys at the end of every day (an act of love I'm typically happy to do, getting his house ready for another day of fun) it typically crosses my mind that we have tons of toys when there are so many kids... that do not. I know, I know, a slippery slope of sloppy thought on which my guilt figure skates, but a but that I've yet to de-hair despite charity and serious thinking.

So, back to the gift shop. As the little man stands there, asking for the skull (um, we'll save for it!) and then whittles his way down to smaller and smaller items, getting that gift store gleam in his eye, all of these "buts", I kid you not, run through my head, chasing each other in circles like little Sambo around a tree. P and I have discussed this, when far away from the gift stores, and agreed upon a plan. Or, at lease, seemingly agreed. We've picked out meaningful holidays throughout the year, providing practically monthly presents for the little man. He has expressed a preference for being surprised (rather than present at the purchase) by brightly bound boxes and we've tried to follow that guideline. We have a "wish list for the Universe" that we work from, watching how the Universe provides for us, how we effect our own existence.

But, the best laid plans go awry, or life wouldn't be very interesting. And budgeting and buts at four is less than life expanding. So its back to the drawing board for me, trying to see the" yes", the "of course" and the "buts" in one beautiful package, preferably with a reused bow :)